Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them

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(603): theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them http://tfl.nu/ul8u

Replies (81) Good night (4107) Bad night (1537)
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(714): View more from California

Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.

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(714): Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor. http://tfl.nu/w05t

Replies (10) Good night (638) Bad night (4911)
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(513): View more from Ohio

How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?

(1-513): View more from Ohio

The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.

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(513): How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region? (1-513): The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well. http://tfl.nu/bwog

Replies (28) Good night (1677) Bad night (5547)
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(315): View more from New York

We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"

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(315): We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?" http://tfl.nu/1ge9

Replies (29) Good night (1104) Bad night (8374)
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(512): View more from Texas

He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.

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(512): He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone. http://tfl.nu/7h78

Replies (8) Good night (892) Bad night (3060)
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(613): View more from Ontario

Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.

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(613): Will you be topless? That will affect my answer. http://tfl.nu/lf7u

Replies (19) Good night (6159) Bad night (1014)
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(757): View more from Virginia

Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"

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(757): Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow" http://tfl.nu/vtnd

Replies (8) Good night (2914) Bad night (777)
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(607): View more from New York

im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.

(607): View more from New York

way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses

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(607): im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour. (607): way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses http://tfl.nu/5by3

Replies (10) Good night (4629) Bad night (1204)
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(479): View more from Arkansas

Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.

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(479): Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle. http://tfl.nu/ldbf

Replies (11) Good night (2153) Bad night (1040)
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(519): View more from Ontario

Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck

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(519): Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck http://tfl.nu/6ifi

Replies (8) Good night (649) Bad night (1166)
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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.

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(780): I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall. http://tfl.nu/azun

Replies (5) Good night (642) Bad night (533)
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(406): View more from Montana

its 2pm. u awake yet?

(1-406): View more from Montana

ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.

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(406): its 2pm. u awake yet? (1-406): ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face. http://tfl.nu/0qbj

Replies (0) Good night (324) Bad night (604)
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(954): View more from Florida

We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.

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(954): We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens. http://tfl.nu/nlwp

Replies (5) Good night (913) Bad night (393)
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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals

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(570): An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals http://tfl.nu/zqc1

Replies (1) Good night (427) Bad night (258)
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(775): View more from Nevada

He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this

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(775): He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this http://tfl.nu/dg9b

Replies (1) Good night (409) Bad night (336)

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