whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.