Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  the ice cream truck is coming omgomg

  (1-650): View more from California

  dude, it's 2 am.

  (650): View more from California

  but its COMING

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  (650): the ice cream truck is coming omgomg (1-650): dude, it's 2 am. (650): but its COMING http://tfl.nu/8z5r
  Replies (63) Good night (8476) Bad night (856)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.

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  (706): oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out. http://tfl.nu/6a0y
  Replies (5) Good night (924) Bad night (2947)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...

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  (781): I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer... http://tfl.nu/rcmz
  Replies (22) Good night (2955) Bad night (942)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world

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  (703): A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world http://tfl.nu/xi7q
  Replies (42) Good night (3295) Bad night (5356)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.

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  (720): Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head. http://tfl.nu/67uq
  Replies (5) Good night (2994) Bad night (2138)
• Favorite

  (763): View more from Minnesota

  I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.

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  (763): I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts. http://tfl.nu/j2dd
  Replies (3) Good night (1040) Bad night (2657)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality

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  (616): you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality http://tfl.nu/e7iy
  Replies (3) Good night (2467) Bad night (1175)
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?

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  (843): Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes? http://tfl.nu/3eu0
  Replies (8) Good night (615) Bad night (1516)
• Favorite

  (434): View more from Virginia

  Our room will be decorated with my urine.

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  (434): Our room will be decorated with my urine. http://tfl.nu/12hg
  Replies (2) Good night (580) Bad night (1890)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.

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  (616): Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death. http://tfl.nu/ogc4
  Replies (9) Good night (2083) Bad night (572)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."

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  (214): I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum." http://tfl.nu/4ufr
  Replies (21) Good night (901) Bad night (694)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"

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  (425): I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?" http://tfl.nu/i35w
  Replies (9) Good night (3890) Bad night (870)
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.

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  (910): 6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class. http://tfl.nu/7ju6
  Replies (2) Good night (972) Bad night (495)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  He said he wanted to "superfuck" me

  (678): View more from Georgia

  Does he wear a cape??

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  (812): He said he wanted to "superfuck" me (678): Does he wear a cape?? http://tfl.nu/0f5n
  Replies (4) Good night (1650) Bad night (469)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...

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  (208): Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return... http://tfl.nu/xy3e
  Replies (5) Good night (791) Bad night (494)

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