you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize
