This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize