physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
