The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
