Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
