Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
