singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Randomize
