stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Randomize
