i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Randomize
