She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
