That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
