I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
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