Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize