Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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