seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
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Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
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I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
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