i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics