remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
