bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize