Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Be still, my beating vagina.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
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