Heybabeimwearingurpanties
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
