At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize