she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
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why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
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I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
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