Texts From Last Night

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  (720): View more from Colorado

  More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.

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  (720): More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun. http://tfl.nu/f0pl
  Replies (4) Good night (682) Bad night (847)
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.

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  (505): My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut. http://tfl.nu/nzlu
  Replies (18) Good night (4354) Bad night (730)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.

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  (757): 6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter. http://tfl.nu/kp9e
  Replies (42) Good night (5387) Bad night (872)
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  (252): View more from North Carolina

  I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.

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  (252): I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME. http://tfl.nu/1mf6
  Replies (94) Good night (18354) Bad night (2819)
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  (956): View more from Texas

  Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.

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  (956): Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs. http://tfl.nu/dv3c
  Replies (41) Good night (7205) Bad night (1061)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.

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  (216): another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night. http://tfl.nu/i20t
  Replies (2) Good night (1942) Bad night (865)
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  (316): View more from Kansas

  This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.

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  (316): This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc. http://tfl.nu/hh26
  Replies (3) Good night (2479) Bad night (625)
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  (620): View more from Kansas

  Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.

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  (620): Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak. http://tfl.nu/19rz
  Replies (5) Good night (672) Bad night (2688)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.

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  (919): Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties. http://tfl.nu/7t6a
  Replies (9) Good night (1545) Bad night (324)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma

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  (919): Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma http://tfl.nu/tsev
  Replies (1) Good night (870) Bad night (259)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered

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  (303): Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered http://tfl.nu/0k0t
  Replies (2) Good night (537) Bad night (316)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.

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  (520): dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first. http://tfl.nu/2u4z
  Replies (32) Good night (365) Bad night (1253)
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  (586): View more from Michigan

  I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.

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  (586): I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down. http://tfl.nu/ak0v
  Replies (3) Good night (1032) Bad night (278)
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  (647): View more from Ontario

  after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic

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  (647): after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic http://tfl.nu/1zuu
  Replies (1) Good night (549) Bad night (186)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?

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  (240): Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats? http://tfl.nu/479l
  Replies (3) Good night (641) Bad night (263)

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