I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
15 Things That Could NEVER Happen Anywhere But the South
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
15 Times “Flight of the Conchords” Made You Feel Better About Being a Twenty-Something
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Sext me about skeletons