dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
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