Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize
