If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
