Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
