i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
