call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
MIDGETS
????
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Randomize
