Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
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