There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
