I love black thongs
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
