i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
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