What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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