What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
i need some magic done to my vagina
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Randomize
