no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize