What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
