so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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