yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
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