ya dads aren't the best wingmen
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize