he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Randomize
