I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
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