You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
