READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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