Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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