its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize