My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize