Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize