I love black thongs
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
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